Where's My Butt? My Disappearing Act...

Ladies and Gentleman!
Introducing, The Incredible Shrinking Woman, Susan Booth!
See what happens when she says the magic words, "Liv SXinney!"
Her bottom will completely disappear!

Is it Magic?

I woke up this morning and put on a pair of jeans that my friend Glenna had given me since my size 18 pants no longer fit me anymore. That's when I realized that I was missing a body part. Where was my butt? My pants had nothing to hang on.

I've never been one to wear the low rise pants with the thongs showing. Brittney Spears completely destroyed the self esteem of millions of tubby ladies when she made that a fashion trend a few years ago. Now that it's no longer in fashion, (I do watch What Not to Wear on TLC occasionally), my underwear is hanging out a good 3 inches above my waistband. Unfortunately, not having felt that sexy this past decade, I have resorted to wearing, what my daughter refers to as, granny undies. Okay, it's not attractive, but seeing 3 inches of white cotton above my jeans is really exciting!

I hope I haven't grossed you out or made you lose your lunch by sharing that, but it is interesting is how I'm beginning to feel sexier, prettier and more confident!

Becoming a Hottie...

Yesterday, while on my son's school field trip, I was grouped with the single father of one of my son's class mates, to chaperon 5 kids at the museum. We were laughing about raising children and having fun with the kids when he said, "Let me see your hands". Innocently, I put them out in front of me, thinking he was going to comment on the two Spiderman Bandaids on my fingers. As he looked at my wedding ring, he said, "Oh, I figured you must be married. If you weren't I would have invited you our to dinner." Wow! I was getting hit on!

He actually was very sweet and I am considering introducing him to one of my sisters.

Please know that I absolutely believe in the sanctity of marriage and love my husband very much. I would never consider doing something to jeopardize our relationship. However, it felt great to have someone be attracted to me in that way.

My husband, who doesn't really have a way with words, once said this to me, "You're not the fattest hottie, but you're the hottest fattie". If you knew my husband, you would know that he didn't say that to be offensive, it really was his idea of a compliment. (Sigh...)

When I shared with Paul what had happened, he looked at me and simply said, "You really are looking good these days. Just know that I love you regardless of how much you weigh." That was the best thing he could have said to me. My heart just swelled!

My husband really does have a way with words. He's such a romantic.

Susan

P.S. My little guy, Oscar is so funny! When he took that picture of my behind, he said, "You blinked!" What a great kid! It's wonderful having the support of the people you love. Thank you to all!